Yes... That is my SISTER breastfeeding MY baby.

Nope. This is not clickbait. That picture right there is in fact my big sister, breastfeeding my baby... Now before you get weirded out, or begin to judge, just... well, don't. Whilst I was pregnant I had developed this deep fear that I wouldn't be able to breastfeed, and people, being people, assured me that I would not have any problems and that the fear was completely irrational.

And while I get that people want to make you feel better, I wish someone would've rather educated me better... Because, look where we are now.

We weren't always here, you know. The first two weeks of little Nova's life, I had plenty of milk, I was basically a cow; but I was also dealing with some post-birth complications (which I am yet to write a post about) and I did not realize (and nobody told me) how much stress, medication and pure exhaustion could impact your milk production... Fast forward to week 3, where we found ourselves sitting in a hospital, with a Paediatrician, convinced that something was wrong with our perfect little angel. Week 3 was rough man. Nova cried, no, she wailed, for the entirety of that week. Day and night. 24/7. She didn't sleep and it felt like she was constantly on my boob. CONSTANTLY. After a night of us sleeping over at my mom (because we NEEDED the help) I had a complete panic attack. I didn't know what I was doing wrong and I didn't know what was up with this little babe... But, I could. not. deal. While we were in the doctor's office, Nova started screaming and panic immediately overtook my body. When I heard the doctor say, "this child just sounds like she is hungry," my heart dropped. "How could she say it so easy-breezy, was she saying that I don't feed my child?" "How dare she?!" "Does she know that Nova is attached to my breast ALL day, EVERY day?!" "I can't even take my salt baths without having someone feeding on me, does she know that?!" LOL yup, all of those thoughts went through my head for the remainder of the consultation. When she suggested that we move to formula, oh boy, nothing could've prepared my Mama heart for that. I felt like the most useless being there ever was (honestly, sometimes I still do.) Now, I have absolutely nothing against people who choose to formula feed their baby, absolutely NOTHING. If your baby needs food, do whatever is best for him/her and do it immediately. But I, me, Robyn-Ashley, I had a desire, a dream and a plan to breastfeed my baby for as long as I possibly could. So when the option of formula came up, I knew I only had one other option... MY SISTER! My older sister, Lindsay, gave birth two weeks before I did, to my precious little niece, Grace (she really is so precious! The happiest little girl you could ever meet.) Immediately I knew that I needed to call her, and ask to borrow her boobs, just until we figure things out. (Now let me also just put it out there, if I didn't have my sister, I too would've gone straight to the store to buy Formula... Please know that I am by no means disregarding Formula Feeding.) Part of me thought that was the most strange request in the world, but all of me knew that she would say yes without batting an eyelid. And just like I thought, she didn't even have to think about it. She was at my mom's house within a matter of minutes, and bam, Nova was being fed a full meal for the first time in a week and I got to keep my desire of having my baby breastfed (even if they weren't my breast). (Also, I must just say, it was the sweetest thing watching Nova before she latched on... Poor darling was so confused and so unsure if she should do it. She kept on looking at me with eyes of "what the hell are you people doing?!" but eventually, she could not resist the smell of that milkies!)

So while we still haven't fully figured out my post-birth complications (yup, two months down the line) I have been on a mission to get my baby back on my boob. Supplements, diet changes, Fenugreek by the bottle... It's truly an exhausting and unfruitful ride. Physically, I am exhausted; emotionally, I am drained. BUT in walked a fairy godmother, (well, another one... my sister has been pretty magical too!) This fairy godmother waltzed into my life unannounced, very gracefully and she goes by the name of Mrs. Milk. As soon as I spoke to her for the first time, I just knew that we were going to be okay.

'Mrs. Milk' is a South African based wizard who almost every mother speaks of. She has come to the rescue of countless breastfeeding mothers, and now she's thrown her life jacket out to me too. I've just received a box of her delicious lactation bars and I was (am) so excited, that I decided to do a post straight away... So, I'm sorry that there are no beautifully curated images in this one... I just wanted to let you all know about her, REAL quick. (And yes, I haven't even started them yet.) I know some of you are already super curious as to what these little gems are, but don't worry, for the next few weeks Mrs. Milk and I will be on the journey to #MakeMoreMilk and I'm taking you all along for the ride. For updates on my breastfeeding journey, as well as useful tips & tricks from Mrs. Milk herself, (plus a sneaky little surprise), keep your eyes peeled and subscribe to my page, so you don't miss out!